Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Condoms Couldn't Possibly Prevent AIDS or Pregnancies

From CNN November 21st:
LONDON, England (AP) -- The global HIV epidemic continues to expand, with more than 40 million people now estimated to have the AIDS virus, but in some countries prevention efforts are finally starting to pay off, the United Nations says.

For the first time there is solid evidence that increased efforts to combat the disease over the last five years have led to fewer new infections in some places, said UNAIDS chief Peter Piot.
Previously improvements had been seen in places such as Senegal, Uganda and Thailand, but those were rare exceptions.
"Now we have Kenya, several of the Caribbean countries and Zimbabwe with a decline," Piot said, adding that Zimbabwe is the first place in Southern Africa, the hardest-hit area, to show improvement.
These are all countries that have invested heavily in safe-sex campaigns and other prevention programs, with the result that prevalence of HIV among the young has declined.
"People are starting later with their first sexual intercourse, they are having fewer partners, there's more condom use," Piot said.


So let me get this straight, education, prevention programs and more condoms are attributed to decreasing the spread of AIDS in all these countries but even with all this information and the tools available people still have sex, even if it means their life. Yet there are people in this country who believe that they don't need things like condoms and sex education because the schools should just teach their kids to not have sex and that will solve everything. If the threat of AIDS and death hasn't deterred people then the possibility of having a kid that your parents will raise for you will not prevent our teenagers from having sex. Guess what? Teenagers have sex; that is what they are biologically designed to do and no one is going to be able to stop it. Do you think a teenager who can't be relied on to clean his room, cut the grass, not take guns and drugs to school can be trusted to not have sex with your daughter? Think again. Remember how horny and stupid you was when you were a teenager?

Condoms are not evil and Jesus won't take away your birthday if you provide kids with condoms in order to avoid AIDS and teenage pregnancies. You can teach abstinence all you want as long as you keep condoms available to the large number who will not abstain. It is no coincidence that the Bible Belt, the very people who are against condoms in schools, has the highest rate of teenage pregnancies, children born out of wedlock and poverty, within the United States.

Oh, and in case you forgot how to avoid AIDS, I will again share my AIDS prevention tips with you one more time:


How not to get AIDS:

Don't have sex, stay home and jerk off to skinamax half porn, or get a blow up doll.

Don't have sex with someone who has AIDS, even with a condom.

Don't have sex with someone who is bleeding out of their ass.

If you must have sex with someone, use a condom.

Don't have sex with people you don't know or just met in a mens room, George Michael included.

If you know of someone who has had sex with an AIDS victim, do not have sex with that person.

If you shun condoms because you "dont like the way the feel", ask yourself how a big dose of AIDS would feel.

If you want to have a good (long) sex life, find a committed partner that you can trust that has had an AIDS test.

Don't tag team some other guy's ass with a bunch of leather dudes you just met at a bar.

Don't have sex with someone who has ever been tag teamed.

Don't believe people when they tell you they don't have AIDS.

Don't frequent glory holes, either side.

Don't blow heroin addicts or crack heads in alleys.

Don't share needles with heroin addicts, more specifically, heroin addicts with AIDS.

Don't have sex with prostitutes, or a junkie prostitute with a bad itch.

If you are African, having sex with a virgin does not cure AIDS, it spreads it.

Dont' become "blood brothers" with someone who has AIDS

Don't be born in Africa.

Don't let herpes victims with open sores on their mouth give you a blow job, as these people tend to not be as careful and selective as someone such as me and may also have AIDS, though I will not blow you.

Don't let anyone cum on any open sores, cuts or orifices.

Do not become, or have sex with a porn star, more specifically a gay porn star that has violated my other rules.

If you do any of the above, get an AIDS test every week.

If you are a gay basher, don't make your victims bleed as the flailing blood may stain your Ted Nugent shirt, infect you and later, your fat girlfriend who lives with you in your double-wide.

If you are an NBA player, don't nail every white woman between L.A. and Boston that is trying to get knocked up by someone rich and famous.

If you are a Catholic priest, condoms are evil, fuck little boys who couldn't possibly have AIDS yet.

If you are an altar boy, don't hang out with priests alone.

If you are Pat Robertson or Jerry Falwell, don't mock God, he will punish you with AIDS.

If you're Bill Frist, a medical doctor and US Senator, don't let anyone sweat or spit on you.

If you are Tom Delay, rules obviously don't apply to you, feel free to do all the above.



P.S. These tips may also be effective in not getting knocked up when you are 14 years old.

39 comments:

NewsBlog 5000 said...

Remember how horny and stupid you was when you were a teenager?

I resent that. For your information I am still horny and stupid.

Dr. Van Skleeve said...

It's too bad that the Pope proclaims that condoms are an abhoration of God and should never be used. With the membership of the Catholic Church numbering in the hundreds-of-millions, many people take church law (not really the same as the word of God) quite literally. By heeding this medieval dogma, many devout Catholics (especially in under-developed nations) don't use condoms, yet may still practice unafe sex and therefore, expose themselves to HIV infection. These practices also contribute to over-population. Yay!

Toad734 said...

Newsblog:

Present company excluded of course

Dr.:

So isn't sex out of wedlock a sin too? Do Catholics believe that having sex with someone whom you aren’t married to is better than doing it with a condom? Do they think two sins is just overkill or something?

If you are going ahead and committing the sin of adultery you might as well go all the way and use a condom as well.

It's like killing someone but then not speeding when you flee the scene. At that point I think speeding is the least of your concerns as far as the law goes.

Dani said...

Teaching kids to have “safe-sex” is as logical as teaching them how to do “safe drugs” and how to “safely” drink and drive.

Ryan said...

Dani-
Not that I agree with it on all counts but most drugs are illegal for all ages and at all times. Drunk Driving whether safe or not is also always illegal.

Sex is not illegal in most cases and the only thing that makes it against the law where condoms would apply is an arbitrary age requirement.

Comparing teaching kids to have "safe sex" to teaching them to do "safe drugs" and "safely" drink and drive is like comparing teaching kids to wear "safety belts" to teaching them do "safe armed robbery" and "safely" drive a car through a crowd of pedestrians.

Two aren't ever legal while one is almost always legal, even though you may not think it is moral.

Mike V. said...

so, Dani, we should not teach them the truth?
we should rely on ONLY abstinence education to stop horny kids?
yea, that will work.

Dr. Van Skleeve said...

Well, I suppose when a person is tempted to cheat, they're just going to do it in their moment of weakness. If they're in the habit of having using condoms anyway, it could make a life or death difference, or of having an unwanted pregnancy. I don't think using condoms makes one more likey to cheat. Whether or not they make condom use a habit could be influenced by the Vatican, which of course promotes abstinence and the "rhythm method". Ask the Catholic parents, or any of their four to nine kids, that I grew up with, about the reliability of the rhythm method.

Aberrant Templar said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Aberrant Templar said...

Note to self, always preview posts for typographical and grammatical errors before posting. Maybe I’ll get it right this time.

“Teaching kids to have “safe-sex” is as logical as teaching them how to do “safe drugs” and how to “safely” drink and drive.”

What a wonderfully loaded, misleading analogy you’ve got there. I am impressed how you compared the general, neutral word “sex” with the specific, negative drunk driving.

Otherwise I’d wholeheartedly agree with you. Comprehensive sexual education has a lot in common with, say, a defensive driving or responsible motor vehicle operation course.

Dani said...

Ryan - Kids are going to do drugs and drink anyway, doesn’t matter if it is legal or not, so why not teach them how to do it “safely?”

Mike – the TRUTH is that sex should be saved for marriage. Amazingly, most kids who are homeschooled and raised with morals and values don’t behave like horny little bastards. Most of those teenagers would never have a problem cleaning their rooms, cutting the grass, or taking guns and drugs to school, like Toad suggested. They are taught to be respectful and to value something as sacred as a sexual relationship. They have greater self confidence because they learn not to give themselves away like a cheep piece of meat. Most are virgins on their wedding day and don’t have to worry about the burden of unwanted pregnancies, HIV and other STD’s that sex before marriage would bring.

When it is socially acceptable to behave like a whore, guess what...teenagers learn to behave like whores!

Mike V. said...

non-answer, Dani.
absolutely, positively a non-answer.
BTW, care to share statistics you have on homeschooled teenagers compared to private and public school teenagers?
Your idea of non-education has never worked on the population at large, both here and abroad where the idiot Catholics and others have tried it.
People are going to have sex, and if they are not prepared with all the info they need, the consequences are not good.

NewsBlog 5000 said...

From my experience going to a Midwestern religious college, the people who were most denied opportunities to experiment with things such as alcohol, drugs, and sex were the ones who really went nuts and out of control when their parent's backs were finally turned.

And the most "conservative" people sexually were the ones who ended up putting themselves in the most dangerous sexual situations, because they were ashamed to buy condomes, to masturbate, or have sex while they were sober or outside of other date-rape situations. I remember seeing a security alert reminding women not to let men take them home from bars. And our school was by no means considered a "party school"

Mike V. said...

straight forward honesty is the way to go, newsblog, and it always has been.
our parents were open, honest and answered questions.
yes, it is a good idea to make sure kids understand that they should not have sex before they are ready and that they should be safe and practice abstinence at all costs.
however, in the real world, the latter is not the only way to go.
I also saw the same things you did. Trying to hold back the sexual urge of a teenager with nothing but "don't do it!" will not work.
they are not stupid.

BRUISER said...

Did Dani really say that teaching safe sex is the same as teaching kids to do safe drugs? And teach safe driving ? Yes all these things can be fatal yet people do them every day. Unlike the current "Abstinence Only" education in schools we now have more responsible students being arrested for passing out condoms for promiscuous fellow students whose parents either are not there or just don't care to let them know that they could do better than being pregnant before a secondary education and possibly a better paying job and a sense of hope? I believe Dani would think that progress should be stipend and the evil "safe" alternatives to death would be better yet handled by the "Drug Addled" Brain of George Billy Bush Jr. Go home Reps. and fix your own house before ruining mine.

BRUISER said...

PS- Dani...


You stated-

"Amazingly, most kids who are homeschooled and raised with morals and values don’t behave like horny little bastards."


The Police stated-

"Two-Home schooled Chrisitan evangelical children killed their parents."

Mike V. said...

I guess at this point, it could turn into a let's beat up on Dani party, but we're already at the saturation point because we're dealing with someone that is not really firing on all cylinders.
When someone is coming from a place where the only way that they can frame a debate is to essentially trot out the bible, it's already futile.
Whether we're talking about evolution (which is fact) or teenage sex, you can't just point to a collection of stories that includes condemnations for eating shrimp and that the earth is flat.
God didn't make the stars look millions of light years away. They are.
God gave us a brain to use, and we need to use it.
He also gave us free will, and with that comes all of the complexities that come with any freedom.
I feel sorry for someone for whom the world is public school whores and homeschooled angels.

Ryan said...

Dani's comments aside, the global gag rule on aid to ailing countries is really a dangerous, damaging, and irresponsible policy.

It is one thing (given that its an extremely stupid and self destructive thing) to expect American kids to avoid pregnancy and disease without teaching safe sex.

It is an even more awful mistake to hold money over countries in AIDS stricken Africa for aid to their poor giving it if and only if the funding goes to abstainance only education.

We are essentially aiding and abetting these people as they kill themselves just to make our christians feel better about their sexual hangups. As many people die of AIDS in Africa each week as we lost in Katrina. Doesn't this warrant us to get over it and teach them to use condoms to help stop this disease?

You know what happens in Africa when a man dies of AIDS? All of the other men of the village take turns on his widow to decide if they want to take her on themselves.

The woman hasn't much of a choice especially if she has children, and must hope that someone will take care of her. All the while the disease is spreading like wildfire.

Toad734 said...

Dani:

I know this is a low blow but you said home schooled kids were raised with morals and values and don't act like horny little bastards but I don't think killing your girlfriends parents would count as moral. I would much rather have a horny teenager than one that would kill me and run off with my daughter. In other words stop acting like home schooled kids are somehow superior. We have yet to see how these slew of kids turn out as adults. The fact remains that the US was the richest and most powerful nation in the world thanks, in part, to our education system. I don't know how we could expect much better. The majority of home schooled kids I have met were extremely self centered and have major social issues and haven't figured out how to identify with the rest of the world, or I should say, can't figure out why the rest of the world hasn't related to them yet.

So get off the home school is better kick. The fact is there are very few adults who are now successful members of society who were home schooled as kids. The fact of the matter is that you do not have a teaching degree, you are not a social worker, you are not a speech therapist, you are not a psychologist and you and no other home school parent are all these things either so it will be very difficult for you to identify problems with your kids that schools are set up to identify, monitor and correct. Especially taking into account that every parent is blinded with their own child’s perfection that they would never admit to themselves that any of these problems existed.

And by the way; we should teach kids how to do drugs safely, sort of. Do you really want your kid to end up at a party without even knowing what heroin is, how to take it and what it is capable of? Do you really want them to share needles with other users? Do you want them to not know what is really in Crystal Meth? I think those are very important lessons and ignoring them doesn’t mean your kids will never do drugs. Ask my parents how well not talking to my brother about drugs worked out for them; three shared needle heroin overdoses later.

And as pointed out sex is not illegal, not yet anyway.

Ryan:

Agreed, forcing these countries to promote in abstinence only programs in order to get money is ridiculous; either give them aid or don’t. If you want to help someone help them but don’t force your morals unto other societies and think it will work; this is exactly what we complain about from the fundamentalist Muslims who want to overthrow middle eastern countries in order to establish a theocracy which everyone would be forced to live under.

Dani said...

Mike - Of course I could share TONs of statistics on homeschooled teenagers compared to private and public school teenagers and how homeschoolers are academically and morally FAR superior to the average public school teens. But I'm not going to give them to you because you live in a world where all truth is relative and you are comfortable in your own ignorance. The information is out there, if you really gave a rats ass you can find it yourself.

Bruiser - So, "Two- homeschooled Christian children killed their parents." Hmmm? I wonder how many public school kids have killed their parents along with their siblings, teachers, coaches, counselors, and other students?

Toad - you said, "The fact remains that the US was the richest and most powerful nation in the world thanks, in part, to our education system." And America is the DUMBEST of all too. Coincidence? - Don't think so!

But what do I know? I am just some loony homeschooling nut-job that believes in the absolute moral laws of the Bible.

Grant said...

Too many modern day parents find it easier to hide behind plattitudes than to deal with the problems facing their teens. I think most forget what it was like during their teen years. "Abstinence - yeah, that'll work." True, some may not have sex if they can't get hold of a condom, but others will listen to their hormones and get pregnant, spread disease, or both. It seems like a hell of a gamble to take with your child.

And speaking of Hell, you'll be going there yourself if you continue to criticize the Nuge. Cat Scratch Fever rocks! :-)

Toad734 said...

Dani:

I would love to see non-biased facts and figures of homeschoolers post college lives, as applied to the real world. And no I am not talking about the ones with bug collections instead of friends.

Fact of the matter is that only the education you are giving your children matters. Since homeschoolers aren't exactly uniform in their approach you can't say that anyone home schooled kid is better off than someone who went to Jesuit or even magnet schools funded by the state. In those situations you at least know that the education you are getting is coming from educated people. I can legally home school my kids with only a high school education; does that make any sense?

And it doesn't really matter how smart you are if you live in a ditch somewhere does it? And by the way we are not the dumbest country in the world by any stretch of the imagination. We rank pretty low as far as other western countries go but what you are calling for is Madrassas such as the ones in the Middle East; where have those gotten them?

Two Minutes J said...

Hey, I lost my virginity in a 'Tag-Team' match. I got sloppy seconds too. I've shared dirty needles while using heroin, and I've had unprotected sex with over 25 women. Seriously. And I'm fine. Not that I advocate that kind of behavior, but I was one of the 'lucky' ones. Alot of my friends aren't so lucky. I can name 4 of the top of my head that caught Hep from sharing needles. I can also name 4 or 5 that caught Herpes from unprotected sex. But as far as I know, I don't know anyone with AIDS. By the way, you know AIDS is a man-made virus right?

Mike V. said...

Dani, you are the cop-out artist.
At this point, you have not a shred of credibility.
It's fun living in a black and white world for folks like you.
It's like a self-imposed lobotomy.

Mike V. said...

BTW, Toad, I have been having fun over at Mike's America.
Holy crap on wheels, that guy is a fucking mental patient.
Just in one post, you have to scroll down about have way to the post of his with comments from the 18th with "It's War!" in big red letters.
Of course, he completely sidesteps everything I say.
Fucking knuckledragger, I love that shit.
Watching those idiots implode is awesome.

Dani said...

Hey Guys -

I thought you all would get a kick out of this: TOP TEN REASONS WHY LIBERALS HATE THE HOLIDAYS

Happy Thanksgiving!

Mike V. said...

another strawman by a conservative.
surprising.
two things:
Define the word Liberal.

If you are a Christian and a conservative, I hope like hell you do not support the current president, because if you do, you are a massive hypocrite.

Dani said...

Trust me, Mike - If there is one thing we can agree upon, it's that I absolutely despise President Bush.

Define the word Liberal:
A liberal is generally not limited to or by established, traditional, orthodox, or authoritarian attitudes, views, or dogmas. Liberals are usually open to all kinds of new ideas and very tolerant of the ideas and behaviors of others - Except Christianity!

Liberals tend to be lacking moral sensibility and tend to reject moral absolutes. They will fight to save the rainforests while demanding the right to kill unborn babies. Most liberals are offended by the Nativity Scene and the words “Under God,” but they support perversions like homosexual marriage and pornography.

Mike V. said...

your first paragraph is correct (except for the last sentence) and the last paragraph is opinion.
now, since this is a secular nation, Christianity shouldn't be an issue to me or anyone else the same as any other religion because that's your own private deal with God.
I don't want creationist nonsense taught in my public schools along with real science, and (most) churches do not teach evolution in Sunday school. It's very simple.
There are plenty of "liberal" Christians because they actually use their brains and understand the words in the new testament and are also smart enough not to take every word of the Bible literally.
I'd like to see the number of abortions reduced in this country as well, but without education and birth control, it's hard to do.
We have an FDA that's working hard to keep Plan B out of people's hands.
You have idiot pharmacists that have turned away adults seeking both that AND regular birth control (should they do so, they should be immediately fired because they are not prepared to fill a legal prescription).
I'm not offended by a Nativity scene, most people are not.
But why can't your type be more tolerant of others that might be of another religion?
We are a secular nation full of all kinds of people that believe all kinds of things.

Boiled Owl said...

Not to burst Dano's bubble, or yours either Mike V. but here's the real definition of "Liberalism":

"A political theory founded on the natural goodness of humans and the autonomy of the individual and favoring civil and political liberties, government by law with the consent of the governed, and protection from arbitrary authority."

In short, I'm betting Dani is probably a liberal. Who knew?!

Mike V. said...

actually, the first part she wrote is also included in the webster's definition.

Toad734 said...

Mike V:

Here are the only things he can think of as comeback and will use them over and over again:

You are a Socialist

Quit reading Michael Moore and Barbara Streissand (which I dont)

You are too far gone to attempt to reason with

It looks like you are off your meds again.

Those are his answers as to why we are at war, why the Bush administration is full of criminal traitors, and everything else.

He also thinks if you don't have a big yard that it is socialism.

Very entertaining but its kind of Stepford childrenish over there with all his minions. You know its the Bush can do no wrong, liberals lie crowd; you cant reason with them.

Seanny McShawn said...

Oh Dani, you so funny.

Consider this, kiddo, for two individuals, regardless of ethnic/economic background, to live together in peace, there must be rules. The more individuals, the more rules, as different needs must be accommodated. Can we agree on this much? Good. There are your moral sensibilities. We, as a society, generally accept that we can’t go around shooting our neighbours and stealing their lawn ornaments, because we know that our other neighbour will just take that opportunity to shoot us and make off with our extensive collection of ceramic pigs. There are basic rules that we follow, regardless of religion, that dictate our day-to-day behaviour. This way, we all get to live in relative happiness. Some folks don’t see it that way, sometimes as a result of psychological dysfunctions, sometimes because of social dysfunctions… essentially, there are many factors. But in North America most of them have nothing to do with belief in God, because we’ve observed numerous people from all walks of life doing stupid, dangerous, “immoral” things. So there are just as many people from your walk of life who “lack moral sensibilities” as there are from mine. It’s how people are. Just because some of your religion's social norms overlap with secular society's social norms doesn't mean that secular society's norms would cease to exist without your own.

Now, what moral absolutes are you referring to here? And what world do you live in where anything is absolute? Besides God's Law, in your case, but that's relative too, because not everybody believes in your god's law. More than not on this planet, if I'm not mistaken.

I don’t know about all of you other Liberals out there, but abortion for me has nothing to do with the rights of mothers and personal choice and all that, and has everything to do with my sadistic desire to see tiny unborn children put to death. That’s it exactly. To me, that’s what it really means to be a Liberal. Thank you for wording that so clearly, Dani.

Offended by the Nativity Scene? Maybe offended by the way the Nativity Scene is so often crammed down our collective throats, while other cultures’ equivalent practices and displays are so thoughtfully left out of the picture. Maybe we wouldn’t have such a problem with the freakin’ virgin birth if you fundies didn’t object so strongly to everybody else’s beliefs. Just a thought.

And I forgot that homosexuals aren’t people like the rest of us. Thank you for reminding me. After all, we don’t let dogs marry, why should we let gays? "Love the sinner, hate the sin"? That's just a cute adage, but I think it's only partly accurate.

Cheers!

Mike V. said...

I hear ya, Toad.

Funny, as a property owner, I always think it's funny when someone does call me a socialist.
Call me crazy, but I'm very certain in the fact that I don't want to relinquish my property rights or the means of production to the state.
Oh, of course when the government throws money to the most wealthy in this nation, to agri-business and to oil companies, THAT's not socialism, of course, that's trickle down economix.

NewsBlog 5000 said...

I am going to go out right now, find a pregnant woman and punch her in the stomach.

Two Minutes J said...

I was reading your rules on how to not get AIDS. I was wondering, would it still be ok to particpate in a Bukkake as long as I wore a rubber?

Toad734 said...

They bitch about socialism and communism but essentially support what I call corporate communism. Corporate communism isn't where the state controls industry or commerce but when industry controls the state and are therefore allowed to merge and monopolize their industry. The same applies to the Media; where the government doesn't control and monitor all media but all media is controlled and censored by one or two corporations with agendas such as clear channel. In this McDonaldized, Walmarted strip mall America the people don't own businesses, only corporations. There is no room for Ma and Pa, just as there was no room for peasants and land ownership in Stalin’s version of Communism. The only difference is that they call it capitalism when it is technically communism but instead of the state owning the corporations the corporations own the state.

Karenpuppy said...

Maybe abortion should be outlawed. Then there'll be a whole generation born into poverty, making them psychologically ripe for the liberal agenda. I can practically feel the red states turning blue as we speak! Be careful what you wish for...

lionelle richie said...

two minutes j: then it's not really bukkake is it?

As for sex ed, my mom found a good method to scare me away from sex as a young girl. When I was about 11 or 12, I hadn't even made out with anyone yet and my mom sat me down for a sex talk that included a mention of her pro-choice views and the offer to help me get an abortion without ever telling my dad. That freaked me out enough that I managed to stay disease, baby, and penis-free well into college.

Toad734 said...

Richie:

After that however....