Thursday, May 26, 2005

We Need A Law Making Them Teach Evolution in Church!

My first draft title was "Why it's Stupid to Teach Creationism in Public Schools", but I figured that wouldn't catch as much attention as the one I went with.

So here are the reasons why it is stupid to try to get creationism, or as it is politically known today, un-Intelligent Design taught in public schools:

1. It's wrong, you’re wrong, your argument disproves itself:
If we are too perfect to have just happened by chance, therefore a superior being with a plan must have designed us that way, then who designed this higher, even more perfect designer? If we couldn't have just happened, then neither could the "intelligent being" who made us. The same logic has to apply.

2. There is no proof:
There is about as much fact and science to back this up as there is on the theory of how the ancient Sumerians were descendents of aliens bred with apes. Both have some written account, although the Sumerians text is at least first hand, unlike the Bible. Please show me one credible, accepted scientific article that proves, or offers any evidence for creationism. And I am not talking about just attacking one small part of natural selection; I want proof from your side, not someone discrediting something from my side.

3. I am always right, therefore, I must be right about this too

4. You can always send them to a Christian School or teach them yourself:
They would also teach your kid that the Earth has only been here for 10k years, so you can ignore the fossil records that conclude anatomically modern man didn't exist on this earth since the beginning of time and didn't show up in the fossil records until about 100,000 years ago. They would also skip over the part as to why there are several different races on this planet that are best suited for their geographic environments. Oh, I forgot, one of Noah's son's was black, one was white, one was Asian and the other was Middle Eastern. Oh, and since Native Americans didn't originally come from Asia, one of his son's wives must have been Cherokee.

5. You could move to Saudi Arabia or Iran where the teachers would be stoned if they taught evolution:
Of course, your kids would be subject to all their curriculum such as blowing themselves up, "America the Infidels", "Women are Men's servants", and "If you die for Allah, you get 70 virgins in Heaven." Do you see where I am going with this?

6. You wouldn't want us to force you to teach Evolution in Church would you? There is a time and place for everything; Science belongs in a class room, Mysticism and fantasy belongs in Babylon 5 episodes and Sunday school. Since you can't measure faith, dig up fossils of faith, or put it in a test tube, you can't put it in a science classroom.

A question for all the Intelligent Design people out there: If your "hypothesis" about a higher being than us being responsible for man is true, then exactly how do you propose we teach this in school?

Intelligent Design, a trick phrase creation scientists (a contradiction in terms) used to promote creationism, implies that a higher being, not necessarily God, created the world and man, or maybe just man, which is it? Does that mean, since you want all viewpoints given equal consideration, teachers must teach kids that it is possible that aliens colonized the Earth, spliced DNA and are responsible for creating humans, or that the Greek God's made us, or do we teach them that God created Adam and Eve? Intelligent Design, by definition, implies either. Again, there are ancient written accounts of all of these events, why give more validity to one and not the other? Is it just because one is more popular? Or is it just what you were taught by your parents?

If this solution is not acceptable to you then why don't you just call a spade a spade and stop camouflaging the term "Intelligent Design" and go back to creationism, Christianity, Adam and Steve or what ever you called it before all of this cloaked terminology you are trying to force down impressionable children's throats.

Do you really think we should replace a theory that is 90% complete with a hunch that is 0% complete? The Bible, written by man after the fact, doesn't count as proof.

Didn't we already settle this 80 years ago back in Tennessee?

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Ooops, looks like Falcarius just got caught in the act of evolving from a dinosaur to a bird.

Falcarius Evolving

Sunday, May 22, 2005

How to Avoid Shitty Blogs

If you, as I often do, scroll through blogger land by hitting the next button you will notice that you are inundated with bad blogs. As to not miss anything good, you typically spend at least a couple of minutes trying to find out what that site is about only to find that it's mindless dribble and you have just wasted five minutes of your aging life.

I have come up with a system that will immediately let you know how to avoid such blogs without actually reading any of the posts.

Don't read any blog that has ___"see below"____ in/on it, because it's going to suck ass:

Pictures of naked dudes
The color pink
Blinking / Flashing
Japanamation characters
Pictures of celebrities
Articles about celebrities
A Picture of Eminem
The words "youth group"
The word "teen"
More than one scroll down screen
Streaming music from 50 cent
Pictures of Honda Civics with wings
Bitching about how bad America has it
Pop up ads
No next button / blogger bar
A foreign language, but doesn't have artsy looking photos of nude women on beaches
The words Mortgage or Home Equity
Any kind of business promotion
Short hand, example: "I luv 2 rite 4 u"
A "Friend of Israel" banner; No, the biggest recipient of US aid doesn't need your support!
A blogs for Bush banner; the previous applies!
A picture of someone's baby
A picture of something someone has knitted
Any discussion about the "war against Christians / the religious right and the liberal media"
More than four paragraphs per post (Me excluded)
A personal journal; No one cares if you ran out of clean socks!
No place for comments; Because you know you are wrong!
A depiction comparing anything to Hitler and the Nazi's
Photos of someone's piercings that they think will freak you out
Pictures of someone's truck or motorcycle
And unless you're a bald eagle, no pictures of eagles standing in front of a flag!
Any shitty list of any kind!

Perfect example of a shitty blog : Shitty Blog

My other shitty lists:

How to be a Republican
Top 25 Ipod Desert Island Songs
Crazy Left Wing Liberal Causes
Classic Sex Offenders
Bomb Throwing Hate Peddlers
Just Sign My Guest Book

Friday, May 20, 2005

Flip Flop Flip Flop

Bush: "I don't think our troops ought to be used for what's called nation-building. . . . I think what we need to do is convince people who live in the lands they live in to build the nations. Maybe I'm missing something here. I mean, we're going to have a kind of nation-building corps from America? Absolutely not."

Wednesday, May 11, 2005
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- President Bush has signed an $82 billion spending bill to pay for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and other projects, including border enforcement and tsunami relief, the White House said Wednesday.

Bush: "New democracies are taking root in Iraq and Afghanistan, and America is proud to stand with them","This legislation will help America continue to promote freedom and democracy."

Ok, I know I am not the first to point this out but come on!

They try to excuse this by saying: "it's a different world since 9/11" or "9/11 changed things".

No, before 9/11 there were obviously plenty of terrorist nuts out there who were plotting to attack America. Now, after 9/11, there's a bunch of terrorist nuts out there who are plotting to attack America.

Nothing has changed. Unless of course you count all the terrorists we killed in Iraq, then, by their counts, there are fewer threats than before.

Best Sports Photo Ever

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I am not a huge sports guy but being from Indianapolis I have to make mention of this. Reggie Miller played his final game last night and I will always remember this shot. He scored 8 points in 8.9 seconds to beat the Knick's in game one of the '95 Eastern Conference semifinals. To Knick’s fans it has to be the equivalent of the JFK assassination.

Basketball fan or not, you have to appreciate this photo; the looks on the faces of the people in the crowd say it all.

Monday, May 16, 2005

Eye for an Eye School of Law

Would you want a crazy fundamentalist Muslim who went to some unaccredited Muslim-only law school representing you, a Christian, in a criminal case? Better yet, you wouldn't want this type of judge presiding over a controversial first amendment case involving a painting of Christians killing Muslims in the crusades would you? That's exactly what Jerry Falwell would like to do. Of course, he would never approve of a Muslim-only law school which derives its code of ethics from the Quran, but he obviously approves of a Christian-only law school which derives it's code of ethics from the Baptist Bible. That's right; Jerry Falwell's Liberty University is joining the ranks of Pat Robertson’s Regent University, and now has a law school, if you can call it that. They only have 9 professors and are not accredited by the American Bar Association.

Falwell: "Liberty University's School of Law will employ professors who are: committed to the inspiration and infallibility of the Bible; committed to the Lordship of Jesus Christ; committed to a strict constructionist view of the U.S. Constitution; committed to training godly attorneys for the law profession, for service in American government or as judges and justices. "

There are several things wrong with the idea of a religious, especially Christian-only, law school. First of all, they are guilty of creating sinners themselves. I don't think becoming a lawyer would count as a sin, nor would going to a Christians only law school, a rip off maybe but not a sin, but the Bible does say that judging another man is wrong and we have no right to do so. Therefore, any Christian judge or justice is inherently a sinner, according to the Bible.
Here are a few scriptures proving my point:

Matthew 7:1:
Judge not, that ye be not judged. 2: For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. 3: And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

Romans 1:32:
Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.

Romans 2:1: Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things.

The other thing wrong with this is that they typically derive their legal and moral values from the Old Testament and the Ten Commandments, not the New Testament which I have just done. Anyone familiar with the Bible knows that the New Testament is the only law that Jesus requires his believers to follow, and that the Old Testament is no longer the guideline as to how to get into heaven, and what Jesus taught replaced the 10 commandments. If those old laws still applied, Christians would still be going to church on Saturdays, they would eat Kosher, never shave their beards and stone their children when they, well, got stoned and talked back to them.

The Old Testament is where you find the ever so brilliant philosophy of eye for an eye, which we all know leaves everyone blind. Could you imagine a Christian judge who had to sentence a child molester; does that mean he would be sentenced to having children molest him? That's an eye for an eye right? He may like that sentence a little too much. Plus that would violate parts of the 10 commandments such as Adultery and thou shall not covet thy neighbor's ass. If coveting thy neighbor's ass is a crime, lock me up, because I have been guilty of that throughout my entire life.

The other problem with training kids to become "Christian Lawyers", is that Christianity has no business in our laws to begin with. More than anything, a Judge applying his "Christian ethics" to any legal decision is unconstitutional Toad Report / Separation. I have said this over and over again, the only 2 of the 10 commandments that may be attributed to our current laws are don't kill, and don't steal. Both of these are basic common sense that have existed in non-Christian societies since the beginning of time to the present day (Communists, Socialists, Pagans, Muslims, Jews etc.).

This is another attempt by the Christian right to install activist judges to the bench that will bring back slavery, end abortion, end free speech(for non-Christians), allow religious political campaigning, take women out of the work force, change laws to favor Christian politicians, allow them to beat their kids, teach unintelligent design in schools and force everyone to live under the ancient and archaic laws of the Old Testament, and not the laws, freedoms and Constitution of the United States.


Thursday, May 12, 2005

New Species

from CNN Thursday, May 12, 2005 Posted: 10:14 AM EDT
New species of rodent found in Laos:
New Species

A question for Christians / creationists:
If no one in the world besides local villagers knew of the existence of this animal, how did Noah get it on the Ark, and how did he return it back to Laos after the flood?

Better yet, why are Laotians short? Why do they have black hair, tan skin and slanted eyes? Is that what Noah looked like? After all, since God wiped out the entire earth besides Noah and his family, we are all descendents of Noah, right?

I know that being a Christian forbids you to succomb to logic, but it's ok, I promise, it won't make baby Jesus cry.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

File Under WTF!

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Ok, I don't know for whom this bathroom was intended but all I have to say is gross. This looks to be a public bathroom but I couldn't think of a worse fate than having to watch a guy two feet away from me take a shit. Who was the architectural genius who came up with this one?
Even worse, what if this wasn't a public bathroom, and this was some wacko couple’s way of showing the world how close and intimate they are. I could almost excuse military style shitters side by side, but this isn't a military bathroom and it's not side by side. In other words there is no excuse for this and if you disagree, you are wrong, and I have a feeling that my blog is not the type of website you typically frequent.

Friday, May 06, 2005

Glamorous Life of A Junkie!

If anyone has ever wondered what it is like to truly be a junkie, I have some suggested reading for you.
A lot of kids see the rock star lifestyle as glamorous and cool. They think they are rebelling and like the shock value that comes with this sort of lifestyle.
Having a brother who has been an addict for roughly 10 years and a heroin addict for about 3 years I can tell you that this is not an easy way out. If you think waking up at 7am in the morning, working 45 hours a week, having someone tell you what to do all the time is hard; Try being a heroin addict. Sure, your typical stoner lifestyle is easy, you wake and bake around 11:30 am, go to work at the record store or coffee shop 30 hours a week and play in your band on the weekend, live in a shitty apartment, with a shitty roommate and drive a shitty car but all in all it's a laid back easy life. If you don't like your job you can just quit, after all, you are going to be a rockstar. Once you cross that line into doing heroin, shooting up, stealing to support your habit, pawning all of your possessions and doing things you always said you wouldn't do, then you have gone too far and you need serious help.

Anyway, enough ranting, see for yourself, read part one before you read part two, there will be a part three in due time:

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Look Ma I'm a Republican, Sort Of

I am:
"You're probably one of those people who still thinks that getting a blowjob is not an impeachable offense."

Are You A Republican?

Oh, and you have probably seen this, its one of those chain letters but kind of clever, I have added a couple myself:

Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:

- Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery

- Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness

- "Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India

- A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation

- Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of gays and Hillary Clinton

- The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

- If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex

- A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money

- HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart

- Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

- Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools

- Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion

- A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

- Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet

- The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

-Black people in this country have the same opportunities in life as white people.

-Being born with money doesn't give you any advantages or benefits over people who are born without it.

-Babies who are born poor are just lazy.

-Child safety caps on aspirin, channel lock outs on TVs, and child safety locks on car doors are a great way to keep our children safe; Child safety locks on semi-automatic weapons is Communism.

- What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

- Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony